Radical Hospitality: An Appreciation of Otherness
Indianapolis First Friends Quaker Meeting
Pastor Bob Henry
November 13, 2022
Good morning, friends and welcome to Light Reflections. Our scripture reading for this mornings is Luke 14:12-24 from the New Revised Standard Version.
He said also to the one who had invited him, “When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”
One of the dinner guests, on hearing this, said to him, “Blessed is anyone who will eat bread in the kingdom of God!” Then Jesus said to him, “Someone gave a great dinner and invited many. At the time for the dinner he sent his slave to say to those who had been invited, ‘Come; for everything is ready now.’ But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said to him, ‘I have bought a piece of land, and I must go out and see it; please accept my regrets.’ Another said, ‘I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I am going to try them out; please accept my regrets.’ Another said, ‘I have just been married, and therefore I cannot come.’ So the slave returned and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and said to his slave, ‘Go out at once into the streets and lanes of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind, and the lame.’ And the slave said, ‘Sir, what you ordered has been done, and there is still room.’ Then the master said to the slave, ‘Go out into the roads and lanes, and compel people to come in, so that my house may be filled. For I tell you, none of those who were invited will taste my dinner.’”
On Tuesday morning, I woke up early with my wife and son to see the Beaver Blood Moon Eclipse – Did any of you get a chance to see it? It was stunning, but as I came in to warm up with a hot cup of coffee, Beth and I received a text from Phil Goodchild. His text read,
“…I’m so thankful for and proud of our Meeting for serving as a safe and welcoming place for all citizens to participate in democracy on Election Day. And for hosting Election Protection volunteer training. Go Quakers!”
Beth was here really early on Tuesday to get breakfast items and lunch ready for the election workers and also to help out in any way. When I came in just before noon, there was a long line of voters, and the workers were taking their lunch break. They were so grateful and said again and again how thankful they were and how they planned to sign up for our poll location each year because of our gracious hospitality.
Now, I know Quakers aren’t supposed to be proud, but I am proud of our Meeting for it’s hospitality in so many ways. I love hearing people share in Adult Affirmation Class, at New Attender Dinners, even over a cup of coffee during the week about how they were welcomed or feel welcome at our Meeting. That is a blessing and I thank each of you.
Quakers have always been known for what we like to call “radical hospitality” - a practice of putting extraordinary effort and emphasis on making people feel welcome.
Not only does radical hospitality have a lot to do with being welcoming, but it also is about helping people feel a sense of belonging or, maybe even better, allowing people to become full participants in our Meeting without jumping through hoops or meeting some criteria.
In our world today, hospitality might at first be seen as welcoming and even being nice or polite, but lately it has also become about being at ease with people and sensing an amount of safety within a group of people.
This has not always been the case in our religious history.
Hospitality looked a bit different in the ancient Near East than it does in America, today. And that was mainly due to hospitality being offered to complete strangers.
Marjorie J. Thompson in her book “Soul Feast” (which I consider a primer for experiencing the Spiritual Life in a Christian context) says this about hospitality in ancient times,
“People who appeared from the unknown might bear gifts or might be enemies. Because travel was a dangerous venture, codes of hospitality were strict. If a sworn enemy showed up at your doorsteps asking for food and shelter, you were bound to supply his request, along with protection and safe passage as long as he was on your land.
All sorts of people had to travel at times through “enemy territory” which meant the hospitality to strangers was a matter of mutual survival. It was a kind of social covenant, an implied commitment to transcend human differences in order to meet common human needs.”
Wow! Let me read that last line again:
“It was a kind of social covenant, an implied commitment to transcend human differences in order to meet common human needs.”
Might it be time for us to reinstate this “social covenant” in our day and age? Ponder that.
Thompson continues, she says:
“Hospitality was a hallmark of virtue for ancient Jews and Christians. But in scripture, hospitality reflects a larger reality than human survival codes. It mysteriously links us to God as well as to one another…Hospitality in biblical times was understood to be a way of meeting and receiving holy presence.”
If we as Quakers truly embrace the theology of “That of God in everyone we meet,” then each encounter with our neighbor, friend, relative is an opportunity to meet and receive “holy presence.”
Or think about in a couple of weeks, you will be having dinner around tables with family and friends which can also be opportunities to experience holy presence if we choose to make them so.
If we are able to engage in radical hospitality – a hospitality that transcends our needs and allows us to enter this holy presence with relatives, neighbors, friends, even people we disagree with, voted different than us, or simply just rub us the wrong way, we might enter a new space of holy presence.
I remember just before coming to First Friends, I had the opportunity for a silent retreat at the Mount Angel Abbey in Oregon. This abbey sits on the highest part of the Willamette Valley in Oregon. From there you can look out on a clear day and see the Cascade Mountain ranges, Mount Hood, Mount St. Helens, and a plethora of other old volcanic peaks.
On my last day there, due to some rain, I had spent some time in the library and was on my way out when I decided to grab a quick drink of water out of the drinking fountain. As I finished taking a drink, I noticed a beautiful sign above the fountain made with colorful mosaic tiles.
On it was written the Rule of St. Benedict #53 – Receive all as Christ.
Receive all as Christ.
Receive all as a holy presence.
Receive all as if we believed that there was that of God in them.
Jean Vanier, philosopher, theologian, humanitarian and founder of the La’Arch Community wrote about hospitality in “Befriending a Stranger.” He said,
“In the midst of all the violence and corruption of the world God invites us today to create new places of belonging, places of sharing, of peace and of kindness, places where no-one needs to defend himself or herself; places where each one is loved and accepted with one’s own fragility, abilities, and disabilities. This is my vision for our churches: that they become places of belonging, places of sharing.”
That could be the summary of my vision for First Friends since I arrived 5 years ago.
See, when we start to receive people differently and allow radical hospitality to see that of God in them, then we are evoked to create new places of belonging and sharing.
One of the biggest problems with churches and Quaker meetings today, is that they too often have stopped creating new opportunities for belonging and sharing. They continue to do the same thing over and over hoping for different results (some label that insanity!)
Often in many of these cases they slowly die and disappear.
That isn’t the way it is at First Friends – it easily could be – but thankfully it isn’t. I love all the ways we have been creating opportunities here at First Friends to help people find a place to belong and share and connect. We are diverse place and that makes us stronger and I believe more beautiful.
I will be honest I think we are getting pretty good at this radical hospitality. Many of us are dedicated to spending time with people for the purpose of developing community, friendships, and deeper relationships and it is paying off – we are learning, growing, and becoming more aware of the beauty that is both inside and outside these walls.
Marjorie Thompson describes this type of radical hospitality and what it takes at its core. She says,
“Hospitality means receiving the other, from the heart, into my own dwelling place. It entails providing for the need, comfort, and delight of the other with the openness, respect, freedom, tenderness, and joy that love itself embodies.”
That means that Radical Hospitality is first and foremost an expression of our Love.
Or maybe I should say, it is an expression of unselfish love.
In our scripture text for this morning, before Jesus shared his parable, he decided to say a couple things to his host.
He says in v. 12, “When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid.
In other words, you don’t give in order to get something in return.
Why not? Because when you behave in this way, it means that you are looking for a selfish gain in some way. That is radical in our world, today.
Instead, Jesus tells the man in vv. 13-14, “invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. 14 And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you.”
In Israel, the crippled, the lame and the blind were obviously the poor of the society. These were the people who, because of their physical disabilities, could not work, and therefore they could not earn a salary. Most of them depended on charity to survive.
Why should you invite them? Precisely because they can’t repay you. This is the exact opposite of the worldly way of thinking – you scratch my back and I will scratch yours.
Nobody seems to give in this way these days, in a spirit of unselfish love. But this is how we are to respond, this is the true essence and nature of radical hospitality – it is a concrete expression of our unselfish love for our neighbor.
Also, I categorize this type of hospitality as a justice issue or part of Christ’s social gospel, because hospitality to strangers often is considered “doing justice.”
Interestingly, if you look carefully at the biblical meaning of justice and simplify it. You could easily say that it means being in “right relationship” with one another.
So, showing kindness to the nomad or vagrant, or offering support to the widow or orphan, taking in the homeless, refugee, or poor, and offering hospitality to strangers (even enemies) – these were all expressions of “just” relationships with one’s neighbor in scripture.
Take a moment to really think about this…who are the nomads, vagrants, widows, orphans, homeless, poor, and strangers in our neighborhoods?
Who are the people who cannot repay us?
Who are the people who are neglected by the mainstream of culture? Where do they live and spend their time? Why are they neglected?
We often look at the extremes and point outside our own four walls, but the reality is too often the strangers are also in our midst. Just maybe the stranger is
· someone who feels alone,
· someone who has no friends, no one to talk to.
· someone who gives and gives but is never recognized by others for using their gifts.
· someone struggling to keep their marriage together and afraid to admit they are struggling.
· someone suffering from depression or melancholia.
· someone who is ashamed by what they have done or what has been done to them.
· Someone who is addicted to pride or power or prestige.
· Someone who is scared or wishes they could be stronger.
Folks, the reality is each of us in this Meetinghouse all have at one time been or maybe currently are strangers.
· We all want to be welcomed.
· We all want to belong.
· We all want to be full participants.
· We all want to be needed.
· We all want to be delighted.
· We all want to be loved.
· We all want to be in right relationships
· We all want to be seen and known.
This is why it is so important that when we practice radical hospitality it, as John Fenner at Parker Palmer’s Center for Courage and Renewal claims, is an “appreciation of otherness.” He says,
“Appreciating the value of otherness, for me, goes beyond tolerance – beyond “you’re welcome as long as you play by our rules.” Appreciating the value of otherness entails a level of engagement, inquiry, dialogue, and interaction in which all members can freely share their gifts, learn from each other, and ultimately grow spiritually together. This is hard work and takes time and practice. It takes a willingness to be stretched and to sit with discomfort. It takes a belief that there is “that of God in everyone.”
So, whether at Meeting for Worship, around the table this Thanksgiving Holiday, at your work meeting, with your yoga class, or wherever you are called to radical hospitality this week, remember to begin by receiving all as Christ, help people to feel that they belong and are appreciated, and remember that we are all strangers seeking to be known.
As we enter waiting worship this morning take a moment to ponder the queries I shared earlier in my message:
Who are the nomads, vagrants, widows, orphans, homeless, poor, and strangers in my neighborhoods?
Who are the people who cannot repay me?
Who are the people who are neglected by the mainstream of culture? Where do they live and spend their time? Why are they neglected?